Loving Life and Not the Game

Our toddler recently complained about a bully—a child that has been consistently teasing and hitting her.

Concerned parents, our initial responses were:

-Why? Were you doing something to provoke the child?
-Just ignore him and he’ll leave you alone.
(and the Hubby’s personal favorite)
-Hit’em back, that’ll teach him to mess with you!

Thoughtful advice to stop a child from hurting. In the short-term, that is.

The truth is, bullies are everywhere—in schools, in the workplace, in your relationships.

We know who they are. They pick on the new kid...complain incessantly...point the finger at everyone else but themselves...take delight in demeaning others. They may even physically hurt you.

And you’ve probably tried your hardest to stop their bullying by appeasing them, ignoring them, fighting back.
And have failed.

My best advice? Don’t play their game.

So the next time he bullied her, she said:
I won’t play with you if you can't place nice. Then got up and left.

Walk. Discover real friends and true love. Appreciate them for giving you genuine advice, for respecting your ideas, for making you happy. Because playing games will only make you miserable. And you deserve better.

Tips for the Staying Fit, Fab while with Fetus

I was a hungry pregnant lady. I ate everything, every second of the day. Burger joints and ice cream shops were my favorite stops. Though I secretly wished our baby was born 40, 50, 60 pounds, I took full responsibility for my poor eating and fitness habits. That over nine months, I packed exponentially more than the recommended 25-30 pounds, by eating everything fried and nothing nutritious.

It took considerably more time—about four years—and a whole lotta sweat to finally shed those excessive baby pounds.

So I wonder, given the hunger pangs and the baby bump, Is it possible to stay fit and fabulous during pregnancy? Excluding the irritating-fabulous-celebrity-moms, of course. (I’m talking to you, Heidi Klum).

Answer: Yes.

Watching my sister maneuver through her first pregnancy suggests that it is indeed possible. Entering her third trimester, she looks amazing. She regularly hits the gym, eats the recommended daily calories and gains the required weight.


After getting the green light from her doctor, sis is determined to continue her exercise regimen which includes strength training and her personal favorite cardio—swimming. She obviously has made some necessary adjustments.

Here , I present her...


Tips when exercising while pregnant.

Pack a healthy snack in your gym bag Don’t end your workout on a low note because you experience a hunger attack. Being pregnant = getting hungry + getting hungry fast. So be sure to pack a banana, granola bar, or something with a bit of carbs and sugar to satiate your sudden cravings.

Wear the right clothes Wear comfortable clothes with enough room for your growing baby bump. You don't necessarily have to say goodbye to your cute shorts and tops - just make some slight modifications. There are obviously certain parts of the body that need to be accommodated, like the tummy area, which can be particularly sensitive to some women. Sis prefers wearing spandex shorts versus baggy shorts—to give the tummy some extra breathing room—matched with maternity tanks. I encourage a good sports bra too—for the developing tatas.

Drink plenty of water Pregnant women are advised to drink up to 64 fluid oz per day (6-8 glasses). When exercising, it's recommended to drink an extra 8 fluid oz per every half hour. If you don't like the taste of plain water, simply add a little lemon juice for added flavor.

Monitor your heart rate One question she’s regularly asked at the gym is whether her exercise regimen hurts the baby. Reasonably performed exercise doesn't appear to cause harm. The key is finding a reasonable level, and that depends largely your pre-pregnancy fitness level and current health. So monitor your exertion by monitoring your heart rate. Make sure it doesn’t exceed 140 bpm by checking it manually or using a heart rate monitor.

Swim Healthcare providers and fitness experts hail swimming as the best and safest exercise for pregnant women. Ideal because it’s a good workout as well makes you feel weightless despite the extra pregnancy pounds.

Do you have any tips to keep fit, fab while with fetus? I will continually pester my sis to share her secrets. But till then, Happy Pregnancy!

Sis is the founder of De*Nada Design , an emerging accessories line specializing in handmade knits for women and men. You can follow her on twitter at @denadadesign.

Building Beauty, From the Inside Out

Biting into a plate of food, I suddenly feel a strange snap inside my mouth. I place my finger on a tooth and abruptly it falls out. I make my way across my gums and, one by one, teeth crumble. I panic as I frantically try piecing together the white porcelain shards in my palm. I suddenly wake up from this nightmare.

A reoccurring dream of mine, I ponder its possible meaning. By this weekend, its significance is painfully clear.

On Saturday morning, I feel an incredible pain in my molar—a throbbing menace that moves through my sinuses, head and ears. Monday morning, the tooth/headache is unbearable. By Tuesday morning, I am dialing dentists, desperately trying to book an appointment.

The final diagnosis: tooth decay, two root canals.

Bedridden for several days, I am fuming over the astronomical dental bill, frustrated that the meds aren't working, sad that I can't be with my daughter. More so, I feel guilt.

These root canals are completely preventable. Yes, I admit, I am a sugar addict. I also hate going to the dentist. I put off important tasks. But these are simply symptoms of a larger, underlying ailment.

Dreams of teeth falling out are quite common. Some dream interpreters believe teeth represent one’s attractiveness, beauty and self-confidence. Caring about how we appear is apparently quite normal and creates a certain amount of anxiety.

But what happens when the pursuit of perfection becomes an compulsion that rots you from the inside out? When you chronically coat your teeth with high-calorie, high-carbohydrate foods and then bath them in hydrochloric stomach acid? When you yet again must confront the unimaginable damage of self-inflicted abuse.

As I work towards rebuilding my teeth, I am reminded of a painful past, battling a very personal, very shameful body image problem. Sad little shards of insecurity and self-hatred that I now hold in the palm of my hand. Though I've come to treat my harmful habits, I still pay an enormous price for my actions, which I hope to one day settle. But that's ok, 'cause I am worth every penny.

Decisions, Decisions

Responding the nation’s obesity epidemic, the USDA recently did away with the food pyramid—our nation’s guide to healthy eating—replacing it with a MyPlate, a plate divided into four main food groups: fruits, vegetables, grains and protein. Represented as a cup to the side is dairy.

The new food icon demonstrates the proper ratios in which foods should be eaten rather than emphasize daily servings and sizes, as its predecessor did.

Will this new symbol encourage healthier eating for the two-thirds of American adults and one-third of children who are currently overweight or obese? Is the plumping of America a question of balanced choices or are we all just overloading our plates?

In high school, while I was touring colleges, my father and I stopped at a roadside diner offering the staple of American dining—the all-you-can-eat buffet. As we walked down the line, I filled up my plate, ecstatic by variety of food and overwhelmed by the many choices. My father took one glance of my plate and said, Dear, you overloaded your plate. Can’t you make a decision?

by PetitPlat Food Art - Stephanie Kilgast

For me, it wasn’t a question of making the right choice. It was question of making a choice (and still is). With so many available food groups prepared in so many ways—fried, steamed, grilled, baked—and offered with so many condiments—syrups, butters, jams, creams—no wonder that those of us who are chronically indecisive overload our plates by weighing too many options.

I've read the nutrition books, I know all about right choices and proper ratios. For me, it's about narrowing the options available in our home and at work. Having healthier options readily available increases the likelihood that I won't overfill. (Note to self: avoid cruises).

If I had my very own food diagram it would read: keep it simple. What would your food diagram look like?